Beautiful is that which is broken.
The heart, whole, glows
And shines when shattered.
The light reaches only through the cracks.
Searching in the silences
For your voice, the breeze of your fragrance.
I hang on to memories and fantasies,
Building castles in my mind,
Adorned in your colors,
Painted by your loves
As the distance has painted us grey.
This is what it is to dream and to dance alone:
Hope chokes and the feet run to…
In the darknesses, in the light,
In the joy…. you are the joy.
When did I lose myself to you?
When will you lose yourself to me
Before you are lost to me?
Comfort is that my tears have run dry.
They watered, softened this smile
Just so we can be.
I will find you, find myself.
I will find us both.
There will be no casualties this time,
Karma will keep her promise, is all.
In the turmoil, find
Maybe if I cut my heart out that I may not feel
I will breathe again.
Feeling is pain, loving is pain,
Breathing, each moment spent dwelling on you
Is sweet pain.
This is a pain that will kill me.
Better I kill myself.
“If everyone is going to dance, who, then, would watch?” ~Cameroonian Proverb
Weary of the spectatorship,
Dreaming of the dance…
Wealth and wonder and women and no worries…
Oh, to be The King,
Yet live gaily, The Jester,
Never need prayer for what are riches for?
Oh, to be The Man,
The Admired, The Lusted-For, The Dreamed-Of, The Oft Sought and Talked About…
Oh, to be!
These fires petering out,
My lids hang heavy and my fingers are numb,
Colors to blues and reds to greys,
Sleep ever the tickle at my neck
And the silence….so incomplete,
Ears ringing and my mouth dry,