For the first time in my life I can feel time slipping away. I inhabit this sensation, the one of already experienced yet not quite grasped loss, the one of impending loss. Each day comes to sharper focus with each passing minute. I have never been more aware of the shortness of it all. Yet, I feel stuck. Life should be hurrying along by now. I should be somewhere else, doing something else, with other people. Not here. Not at this now.